BREAKING: Burns, Safari propose trade

TSN's Pierre LeBrun has reported that select-GM Dick Burns and Safari have initiated a trade inside the V.

"Yes, it's true. I have a strong (pun intended) source indicating that a pending trade has been proposed inside Randy's V. The trade involves Dick Burns trading Phil Kessel and John Tavares to Safari in exchange for Logan Couture and Brent Burns," reports LeBrun.

The pending transaction...

"This is bullshit," said Sitch, who was interviewed by LeBrun earlier this afternoon. "I don't know who initiated this trade, or what the negotiations were like, but this doesn't make sense to me at all. Kessel and Tavares have an O-rank of 9 and 5, respectively. Couture and Burns are 81 and 167, respectively. One-sided? I think so."

It goes without saying that LeBrun's 'strong' source was the meat-head Sitch.

"I will be honest; I voted against this trade, purely because I do not believe it to be equal or fair. I'm sure to get heat for this, but Sitch loves the burn so bring on da heat."

Burgundy and Tree Bone could not be reached for comment.

It will be interesting to see what becomes of this pending trade, scheduled to be completed Nov. 2 subject to the review of all select-GMs.

"The deal is going down!" said Safari via text.

Dick Burns could not be reached for comment. I am hoping he has some wise words.